1. I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
2. Most of the time I dont' have much fun. The rest of the time I dont' have any fun at all.
3. Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
4. To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
5. I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get, and just enjoy it while it lasts.
6. I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
7. It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better, while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.